Kids want respect.
How can kids get that respect from adults?
They need to understand what words adults can hear, and what words shut them down. Every adult has certain preferences – one of my sons’ teachers requires kids to speak loudly, one can’t stand it. Another wants kids who say ma’am, another doesn’t like it.
Some words, though, are “respect markers” for most adults.
Some words convince us a kid is “bad” or “good.”
Whether or not that SHOULD be true, kids deserve to understand how they are seen, and know that words they need to change those perceptions.
Give your kids this sneak peek into grown up secret code.
In our family we’ve been working on getting rid of “I just…” at the beginning of a sentence. As in, Parent: Please don’t play with that at the table.
Child: I just want to do one thing.
Yes, this is a part of an apology that I also dislike! “I’m sorry. I just…” Doesn’t fly.